I just cut my nipple shaving
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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