I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Randomize
