Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
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