i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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