I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize