Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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