I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
