she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
how does that bad decision feel?
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