Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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