Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
