Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
