so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
