we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
