At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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