did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
