R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Randomize
