Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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