just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I just want to make out with him forever
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
