I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
