I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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