Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
