He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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