Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
