id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Come see our sink grown plant.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
