we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
