she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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