his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
