Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i think my mom watched the whole time
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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