Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
