Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
