After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
