I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
