A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
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