Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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