I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
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