he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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