My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
