I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
