Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
