Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He did a backflip because drugs
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
