Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
