found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
