hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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