Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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