My friends, they love my intelligence
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
