Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize
