so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize
