chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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