Me. At least after what I've been through.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Randomize
