I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
